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Aug 13, 2023Babysitting is a tough and responsible job even at the best of times. The last thing you want or need is for the parents to throw bizarre rules at you. Now don’t get us wrong—having rules is fine, but there are common sense limits to how wonky they can be. And if you want your babysitter to keep working for you, you may need to let certain out-of-the-box expectations go.
Redditor u/aitaclothdiapers shared a conundrum she faced some time ago. According to her, her clients demanded that she scrape poop off the baby’s cloth diapers they were using, right into the toilet. This was a boundary that the OP was unwilling to cross and refused the job. However, she felt like she may have made a mistake. Read on to see what happened.
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Image credits: aitaclothdiapers
The author of the post pointed out that she didn’t want to handle more poop than she needed to. That was why she asked the parents to reconsider their parenting approach for just one night.
The babysitter offered them a couple of alternatives. For instance, they could use regular diapers that one time. Or the sitter could simply leave the cloth diapers all poopy for the parents to scrape off once they get back from the birthday party they wanted to attend.
However, the parents refused to look for a compromise. And so, the sitter decided to refuse the job in turn.
“We started arguing so I just left and went home and had a relaxing night. My mom said I should have just done it because they were in a bind but I gave them options and they vetoed all of them so I stuck to my boundary,” the OP explained to the readers on the AITA subreddit.
Most internet users were on the author’s side. They loved the idea that she had given the parents some viable alternatives. They also pointed out that it’s completely fair to have personal boundaries. Just because someone’s working as a babysitter does not mean that they should shut off their critical thinking skills. Quite the opposite!
They need to evaluate what their clients’ demands are, and whether they fit nicely with their prior job experience and understanding of their own dignity.
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Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko (not the actual photo)
Cloth and regular diapers both have their pros and cons. Which family used which ones will depend on the parents’ values, financial situation, how they were raised themselves, and how sensitive their babies’ skin is. For instance, ‘The Bump’ explains that cloth diapers tend to be far cheaper than their disposable alternative.
Because cloth diapers are reusable, they’re more eco-friendly. What’s more, they’re also gentler on sensitive skin. However, they also require poop scooping and deep cleaning, and so you may be using more water and electricity as a result. On top of that, they’re also less absorbent.
Disposable diapers, on the other hand, tend to be more convenient, absorbable, and breathable. On the flip side, they’re worse for the environment. And some dyes and gels in them can lead to irritated sensitive skin.
It’s inevitable that at least some friction will develop between babysitters and parents. But so long as the sitter remains professional while the parents stay reasonable and embrace good communication, everything should work out fine in the end.
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Image credits: Nathan Dumlao (not the actual photo)
To put it bluntly: all parents think that their children are the most important things in the world. And so, they may expect everyone else to fawn over them, and jump through countless hoops just to make them happy.
However, for babysitters (especially those who have their own kids), it’s a job. One of many. Yes, empathy for children is essential in this line of work. But this doesn’t automatically mean that every single rule the parents set should be blindly accepted.
Exact feeding and sleep times are fine, as are lists of dietary restrictions and emergency contacts. And it’s important to be clear what kinds of activities the kids enjoy doing and how much time they’re allowed to spend in front of screens.
What parents should not expect however is for their (often underpaid) sitters to go above and beyond the call of duty. Poop scraping probably falls in that category for anyone who’s only ever worked with regular, disposable diapers before. And sitters need to communicate their boundaries in a friendly but clear way.
If you feel uncomfortable doing something, say so. The more flexible and respectful you are, the better. But you should not have to sacrifice all of your boundaries and principles out of fear of losing a night’s pay. What a professional is willing to tolerate will depend entirely on them. And sometimes that line that shouldn’t be crossed is a poopy cloth diaper that needs scraping.
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Jonas is a Bored Panda writer who previously worked as a world news journalist elsewhere. After getting his bachelor's degree in Politics and International Relations at the University of Manchester, he returned home and graduated from Vilnius University with a master's degree in Comparative Politics. Jonas enjoys writing articles ranging from serious topics like politics and social issues to more lighthearted things like art, pop culture, and nature. In his spare time, Jonas writes books and short stories and likes to draw lighthearted illustrations. A huge fan of literature, films, philosophy, and tabletop games, he also has a special place in his heart for anything related to fantasy or science fiction.
Gabija is a Photo Editor Assistant at Bored Panda. She has recently finished her Graphic Design BA (Hons) studies in Yorkshire, England, and returned home to Vilnius excited to take on some new artsy projects! Gabija loves photography, cats and beautiful pink skies! She couldn't imagine her life without going for a long walk in the forest or having oatmeal for lunch :).
We used cloth for my youngest. I don't understand the parents unwillingness to compromise here. If I were in this situation I would have gladly told the nanny to simply set them aside and we'd take care of them later. It's the simplest solution, and the most fair considering they blindsided her with this. If I was hiring a sitter, I would have made that clear before she even came to my house. I also see no problem with using disposable if the child is in someone else's care, and they're more comfortable with disposable. Good babysitter's are like gold. I'd gladly compromise with someone I know I can trust my kid with.
You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm. I LOVE that!
I was a professional nanny for a while and I despise cloth diapers. No matter how many times you change them, the kid is always either wet or stinky. They just don't wick away moisture well at all - yes, even the more modern ones. YMMV - that's just my experience. Thankfully the family I worked for full time had tried and hated cloth before I started with them so I didn't have to worry about it. For babies that I just sat for occasionally I would take care of pee only and leave the poop for when the parents came home if they insisted on cloth. Otherwise they needed to leave me disposable diapers. I was highly sought after as a nanny so I could just drop any clients who didn't want to compromise. Frankly you shouldn't expect a last-minute babysitter to deal with cloth diapers and just keep disposable on hand for those occasions.
Yes, I agree with you on all levels! I'm sure cloth diapers are better now, but when I was a baby, my mom was gifted a cloth diaper service for a year. She said that one time we were in Florida on vacation, and I was crawling around shrieking bc my butt was "on fire and I was trying to get away from it". They gave me diaper rash so bad my butt bled! And no, my mom didn't leave me sitting in anything; she was a professional nanny and still is. They just don't wick moisture away well at all! She never used them again.
I really cannot stand the weird stench of old, rancid perpee with those artificial lotions and perfume Pampers
Hm, thst might be true for one system the most: pocket diapers. They seem practical at first, stuffing the cloth into a diaper with a permeable and a water proof side. But they leak regularly because it is sawn together, so the peepee goes the other side of the diaper. And the material is difficult to clean, so they start smelling fast. I prefer wool with lanolin, especially for night and summer, so the tushy does not overheat like in one-way-diapers, that are packed with superabsorber (plastic molekules, that absorb water and skin oil, but dont breath, especially when "full")
We used cloth for my youngest. I don't understand the parents unwillingness to compromise here. If I were in this situation I would have gladly told the nanny to simply set them aside and we'd take care of them later. It's the simplest solution, and the most fair considering they blindsided her with this. If I was hiring a sitter, I would have made that clear before she even came to my house. I also see no problem with using disposable if the child is in someone else's care, and they're more comfortable with disposable. Good babysitter's are like gold. I'd gladly compromise with someone I know I can trust my kid with.
You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm. I LOVE that!
I was a professional nanny for a while and I despise cloth diapers. No matter how many times you change them, the kid is always either wet or stinky. They just don't wick away moisture well at all - yes, even the more modern ones. YMMV - that's just my experience. Thankfully the family I worked for full time had tried and hated cloth before I started with them so I didn't have to worry about it. For babies that I just sat for occasionally I would take care of pee only and leave the poop for when the parents came home if they insisted on cloth. Otherwise they needed to leave me disposable diapers. I was highly sought after as a nanny so I could just drop any clients who didn't want to compromise. Frankly you shouldn't expect a last-minute babysitter to deal with cloth diapers and just keep disposable on hand for those occasions.
Yes, I agree with you on all levels! I'm sure cloth diapers are better now, but when I was a baby, my mom was gifted a cloth diaper service for a year. She said that one time we were in Florida on vacation, and I was crawling around shrieking bc my butt was "on fire and I was trying to get away from it". They gave me diaper rash so bad my butt bled! And no, my mom didn't leave me sitting in anything; she was a professional nanny and still is. They just don't wick moisture away well at all! She never used them again.
I really cannot stand the weird stench of old, rancid perpee with those artificial lotions and perfume Pampers
Hm, thst might be true for one system the most: pocket diapers. They seem practical at first, stuffing the cloth into a diaper with a permeable and a water proof side. But they leak regularly because it is sawn together, so the peepee goes the other side of the diaper. And the material is difficult to clean, so they start smelling fast. I prefer wool with lanolin, especially for night and summer, so the tushy does not overheat like in one-way-diapers, that are packed with superabsorber (plastic molekules, that absorb water and skin oil, but dont breath, especially when "full")